


Hurt

by ChelseasDeadSmile



Series: Chelsea's One-Shots [26]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Darcy Blamed James For Everything Wrong In Her Life, Darcy whump, F/M, Songfic, The Author Regrets Everything, coming to terms, super short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-18 21:04:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8176033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChelseasDeadSmile/pseuds/ChelseasDeadSmile
Summary: She never thanked him for staying with her for so long even though she always yelled at him for one something or other.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by: [ Hurt by Christina Aguilera](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwCykGDEp7M)

She wandered around like a ghost putting on a fake smile for all those around her while the man she loved most was absent...was gone.  Long gone.

He was so far from her reach that it was like he was behind a veil of darkness that she wasn’t allowed to follow him too.  She should have realized long ago that she loved him more than she let on, she should have let him see that she loved him at all.  That her failures as a person wasn’t his fault at all, but hers alone.

She was the one to blame for not being able to make it to certain conferences that she was needed to be at, she was the one to blame for every mistake that went wrong in her lab, and she was the one to blame for driving him away.

Her unwillingness to show him how much he mattered to her, how much she actually cherished waking up in his arms made her feel like the day was going to be a good one, that each time he made her coffee before he left to go to a briefing or whatever he needed to do that day let her know how much he loved her.

But the play must go on, she must put on a bright smile as her heart slowly breaks with each kiss he shares with Natasha, with each girls night she must suffer through as she sees Natasha’s happiness at telling the girls about how much the surrogate mother she and Bucky chose looks so beautiful with each month her belly continues to grow, and how much she couldn’t wait to marry the man she’s loved for so many years.

Darcy felt like an outsider looking in, and she had no one to blame but herself for losing the most amazing man that had entered her life in years.

She should be the one pregnant, and squealing with happiness over being the fianceé of the Winter Soldier, but, no, she drove him away after letting the need to succeed in her work life overshadowed the need to be with the one she loved most.

She let the need to accomplish so much in her life when she and Jane were brought to Avengers Tower overcome her that she didn’t think twice about letting the man she loved help her in any way.

All she did was blame him for her failures after she’d ignore him for countless weeks just to work on something she wanted to accomplish.

She never once thanked him for all those morning snuggles that she pretended to be asleep through just so he wouldn’t know she was awake during them.  She never thanked him for the morning coffee’s when she was able to fall over from lack of sleep even though she felt she needed to stay awake.  She never thanked him for staying with her for so long even though she always yelled at him for one something or other.

Which is why she requested a transfer after little Isabel Natalia Barnes was born, because she couldn’t handle him being happy with another woman, so, she sat down and wrote her feelings out to him, her hopes of his future with Natasha and Isabel, and her promise of never seeing him again.

She knew the last part was selfish, but she felt it best that she not interrupt the life he was making with Natasha just because of the feelings she still held for him.

One day she’d come back into his life and be okay seeing him happy with Natasha.

One day she won’t hurt herself anymore by blaming the man she loves for everything that she couldn’t do.

One day she’ll be able to look back on the memories she had with Bucky Barnes and she how hard he tried to be there for her while she was busy trying to change the world, but, for now, she packed her bags for Los Angeles, and kissed the Manhattan skyline farewell.


End file.
